Shigure's lost cause
by The most beautiful of lies
Summary: Poor Shigure, as usual - he can't have anything nice in his house without it being destroyed or set on fire...but he still tries! Here's yet another sadly but hilariously failed attempt...Keep trying Shigure!


_**A one shot for a dear friend, inspired by my newest chapter from my cross over Heart of Innocence. Dear One...I hope this has you falling out of your seat with laughter! **_

Setting his cup of tea down, Shigure Sohma sighed, pleased with himself and his world around him. As a light breeze fluttered through the windows, he felt an almost fatherly pride at the sight before him. Looking around the room, he took it all in, a small giggle hidden behind his fan. Across from him, grey eyes met through a puff of smoke, the look on the other mans face, that of reluctant acceptance. The man across from Shigure had seen this song and dance so many times before and just like every other time he'd been through this with his hold friend, he held his peace...for now...

"Ahh, Hatori have you ever been so happy!?"

"No."

Blunt and straight to the point, it stopped Shigure cold, the fan he was about to tap Hatori with instead retreating into the kimono sleeve.

"You're such a rotter! I should call Aya! He'll be happy for me!"

The look Hatori threw to him was enough to freeze Shigure mid – step towards the phone, his spine tingling. Sitting back down, he quietly sipped his tea, once again lost in the beauty that trapped his sight. It was so serene and peaceful, filling him with a calm so great, he felt like he could write a novel! No! Two novels! Yes! He would do that! Surprise his poor editor for once – maybe she'd be so surprised, she'd go on stress leave and he'd be free for a few months?!

If that happened, he could stay home all day, while sweet Tohru – his little flower – waited on him hand and foot! Oooh! She could even wear the maids outfit he got her for White Day! How exciting! All he'd need to do is get that annoying loud mouth Kyo and Yuki out of the house...but how...? oh! He could send them to the hot springs! But they'd want to bring Tohru...

Shopping! No...Tohru likes shopping...

Kagura would drag Kyo out of the house, no problems! He could call her and say that Kyo wanted to go on a date but was to shy to ask her out himself! Giddy with excitement, Shigure once again stood and stepped to head for the phone. Taking a peek at Hatori, he noticed the man sat there with his eyes closed, seemingly asleep where he stood. Satisfied, Shigure stepped towards the phone, thinking of how to get rid of Yuki. There was always the hot springs lady! Set her off and lock her in a room with Yuki! Once in there, he could put a chair against the door and lock them in until he'd had his day of fun with his sweet Tohru! That would be perfect!

Satisfied with his plans, the space – cadet of an author slowly worked his way to the phone, intent on setting his plans into action. Tohru was the only one he wanted to share this new beauty with! His latest pride and joy, lovingly sought out and carefully brought home! Shigure had tried to share this beauty with Hatori on the way home and in the store – Hatori had driven him of course! - but all the disillusioned man did was threaten to set his precious treasure on fire!

Once they were all set up and safe, the two men had sat down and had some tea, visiting and chatting casually. As they sat there, he couldn't help but sneak a peek at their beauty every now and then. To this point, Hatori had blatantly ignored any hint, suggestion or straight out attempt at discussing Shigure's latest indulgence. Ever since the maid outfit when Hatsaharu asked why Shigure wasn't incarcerated yet, he took care as to when and whom he let see his excitement with certain objects. Much like his writing, he didn't let anyone see it until it was done. Giggling again, he held the phone to his ear and dialled.

Nothing. Not a sound! Not a peep! Not even a squawk! Not that phones could squawk, but anything, any noise would be nice!

"Say something, phone! Hello!"

Falling to his hands and knees, Shigure felt around for the connecting cord, letting himself get lost in the pride he felt towards Tohru's cleaning. She was so thorough! She even swept and dusted in places that are best left alone! Under the phone table for example...!

As he felt around desperately for the cord, there was a cough behind him and Shigure hit his head on the table as he jolted up.

"YOU!"

"Looking for this."

It was clearly not a question, obvious to both men. Hatori stood there with the disconnected phone cord in his hand, the thing dangling there useless and limp. For a moment, a picture of Hatori in cat ears and paws, the cord a floppy dead fish with X's for eyes had Shigure in a fit of giggles. Just imagine! The glare the other man gave him cut his girlish giggles short, like nipping a flower in the bud. Standing with a pout, Shigure walked to the kitchen, leaning over the kitchen sink and allowed his newest treasure to embrace him, settling against his cheek, blown by the softest whisper of wind.

The look of disappointment on his friends face made no sense to Shigure. How could Hatori not love the lace curtains he'd bought?! So light and soft, they blew in the breeze, a secret hello just for him! It would need to be kept a secret or the stupid idiots he lived with would do something to hurt it!

"Grow up..."

Ignoring Hatori, Shigure missed when the man flicked his cigarette stub out the window. What he didn't miss was the ash. As if in slow motion, the ash gently floated it's way to his precious, precious curtains. As soon as hot ash met soft lace, there was no hope. Engulfed in flames, he could do nothing but mourn the loss of his beautiful curtains.

Hours later when Kyo and Tohru came to the kitchen to tell Shigure they were going out, the two teens found him curled in a corner, the charred remains of the once beautiful and graceful curtains held to him lovingly.


End file.
